Stranger Than Fiction

Blade Runner Umbrella

Remember the kewl “glowing” umbrellas in Blade Runner? As I already wrote here in my blog, these are available NOW! from a company called Euroschirm.

Unfortunately, the umbrella isn’t shown or listed on their website, but as my readers began to suggest that this ad may be a fake I hunted down another address where YES you CAN order it directly, thanks to the guys at ThinkGeek.com. Here’s the link, and it costs 25$.

Meanwhile, I have found even weirder futuristic umbrella concepts – stuff that the makers of Blade Runner could never even have imagined …

(There’s also a variant to this theme: The Starlight Umbrella uses optic fibres to simulate a glimmering starfield above your head – with changing lights!)

RFID umbrella

Take the RFID umbrella, for instance. What’s that? Basically, it’s a “free to use” umbrella you can just take away and use in case you need it. The RFID chip will monitor your movement (and make sure you don’t steal the umbrella). The Corp that came up with this idea is named “Dutch Umbrella”, and apparently it was a barkeeper who had the original idea. The tech is there and the umbrella seems to be in use already. Click here for a German article from the Stern magazine.

Satellite Link Umbrella

But wait! There’s more! Americans AND Japanese engineers both had the idea to connect an umbrella with a weather forecasting service. While the American umbrella will display weather warnings and such by use of a small LED display, the Japanese umbrella uses the umbrella surface itself as a large projection surface, transforming the umbrella’s underside into a large computer monitor you can also use as a GPS screen or for video conference or whatever.

The main advantage of the US version is that it can already be ordered at – guess where – ThinkGeek.com. Here’s the direct link.

Here’s the website of the JAPANESE umbrella, and here is an (older) video of the umbrella’s 3rd gen prototype test:

[youtube mpHJBWUcpXM]

In case the video won’t play, try this link.

Watch yourself bleed to death in slow motion

We’ve said it many times, and chances are we will keep on telling you: Cyberpunk’s not dead, it’s just turned into our present. Almost every day, we find stuff that most Cyberpunk authors may have once described in their visions of our future. And in a lot of cases, this future turned out to be a lot weirder than any SF author could have guessed.

So here’s another fine selection of weird and often quite inventive Cyberpunk stuff, this time from the incredibly imaginative website thinkgeek.com

Personal Soundtrack T-Shirt

The definitive add-on for each and every poser gang member. Don’t be satisfied by just looking like Kirk or marching like Vader. Let others hear your personal soundtrack in each and every situation. Catch more information and a funny video of the many uses of this piece of tech here. Available NOW! for 39.99$

Labyrinth Security Lock

Ever thought that security stuff that just slows down intruders (like Cyberpunk 2020 player characters) is unrealistic? You ain’t seen nothing yet. Even in 2020, there are geeks lurking behind every corner. They may even work in the R&D department of your next megacorporate target. Geeks LOVE labyrinths and puzzles. As you can see for yourself with this titanium labyrinth security lock. Available NOW! for 49.99$

Youtube Tazer

Big Brother is here. And chances are, he will never leave. Especially if he is so much fun to have around. Like when you taze that ‘punk that tries to assault you and instantly upload the video of your successful hit to Youtube. Or your security provider. Or the cops. Imagine all the fun you and your fellow Cyberpunks can have with Fashion Guncam versions of this idea. Watch yourself bleed to death in slow motion. Maybe even to your own soundtrack (check out the Soundtrack T-Shirt, above). Available NOW! for 99.99$.

Wii Pee Game

No. It’s not real. You have not just discovered that there is a peeing game for the Wii console. Super Pii Pii brothers? Give me a break. Sorry pal. No rest for the wicket. The peeing game is here (yes, there is a video as well). Available NOW! fpr 34.99$. Peeing controller included.

Snooze and Lose

This one gets a bonus point for creativity in getting the wage slaves off their fat asses and earning the megacorp even more money. Originally, this alarm clock is intended to donate money every time you hit the snooze button to a charity organisation you HATE – giving you a great incentive to get up immediately, instead of snoozing on. By 2020, this gizmos are bound to be installed in every wageslaves appartment. Hit the snooze button, and your employer will receive a payback from your bank account. Hit the snooze button three times, and you may receive the ultimate wakeup call by that tazer they built into your corporate appartment’s bed. They may even share your tazed early morning self via that handy youtube tazer application, feeding the vid directly into the megacorporate employees network. The original SnūzNLūz is available HERE for 39.99$

Have Fun At Thinkgeek.com

There are a lot of other nifty things available there, like the deadly annoying Sonic Grenade, the easily upgraded USB Webcam Rocket Launcher, the highly useful 1.3 Megapixel Spy Camera Glasses, The dream of every Orion Battlelord (see SSDC page for Battlelord RPG info – Orions are aliens that wear kilts) Utility Kilt, the amazing Ultimate Hoody with built-in Personal Area Network, the very first in Urban Flash jewelry, the uber-cool Aurora Borealis Mood Projection Lamp (how could anyone ever live without it!), a f**cking lot of High-Tech watches from Video to WiFi Detection, a top-of-the-notch RFID Experimentation Kit, the TOTALLY innovative Driving LED Emoticon with which you can show other drivers smileys, the TeleSpy Intrusion Detector that gives you a call if it spots any movement in your home, a (soon) very useful RFID Blocking Wallet and the likewise very useful Hidden Camera Detector

Cyberpunk Tech 10: Cyberware – Wo stehen wir?

Einige spannende Links zum Thema Cyberware aus der letzten Zeit:

  • Wie man Organe schafft, die ohne Auslösen der Immunabwehr vom Körper akzeptiert werden, beschreibt Heise hier.
  • Kontaktlinsen mit eingebautem Display (wir haben berichtet) wurde erfolgreich an Kaninchen getestet.
  • Warum sollte man Cyberware nicht hacken können? Es geht doch schon heute. Ein Cyberarm ohne Bluetooth? Wie lädt man denn dann das Firmwareupdate runter?
  • Neurosky: Computerspiele direkt durch das Gehirn steuern. Bald auch für den produktiven Einsatz im Büro?